Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

by Dr. Greg Miles - 4/30/00

Have you ever been stuck in the position of making a very difficult decision? I'm talking about those life-changing decisions. Do I get a new job? Do I move? Of course you feel like your alone, no one to give you the answer or tell you the right thing to do. Of course we all want to know that the decision is the guaranteed right answer. And no one can give us that guarantee.

Here's my hypothesis. When you are making a life changing decision, you have two fronts you fight a battle on. One is the brain and the other is the heart. The brain, of course, is your rational thought center basing decisions on fact and logic. Your heart is your emotion, passion, and your feelings basing decisions on what is wanted or felt.

Sometimes the decision is made easy. The brain says it makes sense and the heart says its what you want to do. The very difficult decisions are those were the brain says "I don't think so" and the heart says just the opposite "Do it, its what you want to do?" Which one should win?

First of all, let me emphasize that no decision should be made without some level of rational thought. So don't exclude the brain from the equation. You should consider every facet of the decision you are making. Actually list the pros and cons of the decision. Some of it may be financial, more or less responsibility, location, impacts to the family, work hours, etc etc. But be sure to consider all the facets. After you weight the pros and cons, the answer may be clear. If your heart and your head can agree at that point, then you are golden.

If after all this painful thinking and listing you have done and the answer is not clear. My suggestion is to go with your heart. If you go against your heart, you are likely to be miserable, regret the decision, and play a game of what ifs. If your heart is happy, then you will likely be happy too.

A person I very much respect once suggested to me, if you're having difficulty deciding, flip a coin, if you don't like the answer, then you likely know what the answer should be.

I am not a psychologist. Please be mindful that everyone has a different way of handling how they make decisions or live their life. This is just some very personal thoughts on a recent mind numbing decision I had to make. Its worse than buying a car. When it all comes down to it, my priorities go like this.

God

Family

Friends

Job

3 out of 4 Ain't Bad huh?